arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
