There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
