Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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