Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
