Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I believe in your delicious
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
the raccoons are back...
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