Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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