There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
please don't ironically join a cult
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