Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
