Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
