Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize