Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Randomize
