i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
