i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
