I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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