What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
