i will never coherently bang her
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
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