i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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