I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
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