Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
