all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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