3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Randomize
