Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Randomize
