if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i just sent this text using only my big toe
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Randomize