you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
