So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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