If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
