Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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