yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
