Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
