He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
