So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
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