i just had sex bonerless
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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