Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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