it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
