Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
