Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize
