She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
You pole danced in your parka.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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