Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize