i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
