i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
