can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
