I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
