Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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