Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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