This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
