I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
