physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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