You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
