Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
We don't watch enough power rangers
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Randomize
