Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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