Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
time to smoke my breakfast
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
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