I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
